History teaches us that we shouldn’t be surprised by events like the current coronavirus pandemic. It’s certainly not the first time something like this has happened. For example, there was a world-wide pandemic in the middle ages known as the ‘bubonic plague’ – and this was even more potent than the coronavirus which we are facing today. Then in the early 1900’s, there was the so-called ‘Spanish Flu’, an unusually deadly influenza which swept the world.
Yet, what makes Covid-19 so shocking is that few of us could possibly have imagined anything like this happening in the 21st century. Our whole way of life is being profoundly challenged. A simple trip to the grocery store is now an anxious search to see if shelves are stocked with the most basic items for everyday living. Who ever would have thought this could happen to us? Not even a hint of warning. One day, things are ‘normal’. The next, there’s a new normal. Just insane.
And that’s the point. Things were never as solid as we believed. We’d placed our faith in a way of life which we assumed was as certain as the sun. It never was. If the global pandemic has taught us anything…it must surely be that the foundations on which we build our lives REALLY matter. Suddenly, all the stuff about ‘faith in Jesus’ makes sense. HE is the only rock who is solidly reliable. Why did we ever allow ourselves to become so complacent and trust flawed human systems instead? How could we have missed the mark so widely? Why would we ever have permitted ourselves to simply put our faith in a way of life that was always precarious anyway?
In this crisis, there are many things which don’t make sense. How long will it last? What will the future look like beyond the ‘crisis’? What will change? What will be the economic price of all this? The lists of questions go on.
I don’t have answers to any of those questions. The only thing that makes sense to me in this crazy season is the message of the cross. Jesus gave HIS life so we could experience HIS life. John 3:16 stands as a pillar of truth in a crumbling world.
My encouragement to you….no…my plead with you is to put your faith in Jesus Christ. He is the light who will show you the way forward. He is the truth who can be completely relied upon. He is the way…the ONLY way to eternal life.
Lean in to his grace. Call out to him. Believe his word. Jesus Christ – God’s Son – who died on a cross and rose from the dead. He did it all for you. That’s real love. He’s totally worth following.
About 18 months ago, I found myself feeling extra-ordinarily anxious. This wasn’t just the normal kind of anxiety that you might experience when you’re nervous about something. No, this was different. I’d never felt anything like this before in my life. Normal tasks caused me to be uptight. Little things became significant concerns. I was on edge. The curious thing was that if you’d seen me, you would never have known my struggle. I didn’t look the nervous type. But inside, this thing was a big deal.
One day, I went to see a doctor about it. This is not the kind of trip I’d normally take…call it ‘male pride’ if you will. But I was pretty desperate. Within five minutes, the young medic was able to identify what was going on. I’ll never forget the letters he uttered “P.T.S.D.” – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
See, earlier that summer, my wife became seriously ill after giving birth to our daughter. The two week hospital drama was an almost surreal experience. Every day during those 12 long nights, I was in ‘fight’ mode – I mean that in the best sense of the word. I was fighting in prayer. I was fighting the good fight of faith. I was fighting to support my wife. I was fighting to speak positively in the midst of the negative medical reports. Then after two weeks of ‘touch and go’, one day, the senior consultant expressed amazement at Lydia’s progress – and announced that she was free to go home. A week later, we moved into a new home (long story) with a three week old baby. All seemed well.
In the subsequent weeks, I threw myself into fatherhood duties and serving my church. Life was great. So much to do and to accomplish. But I hadn’t really taken the time to process the enormity of what had just happened during the summer. How could I? Life was moving at 1000 miles per hour. While my mind was more than delighted to move on, it was as if my body wasn’t so willing. There’s a really helpful book on the psychology of trauma called ‘The Body Remembers’ by Babette Rothschild – worth a read. But how are you meant to rest when you’re a new dad and you’re pastoring a growing church plus you’ve got a billion other responsibilities? The point is…these questions are an irrelevance as far as the body is concerned. If I didn’t take some time to stop, then the body would stop for me. It needed to recover from the ‘fight’. Thankfully, I was able to identify my issue just in time. I dread to think what might have occurred if I’d just ploughed on.
Over the next weeks and months, I found myself gradually getting better. Sometimes, the old anxieties returned with a vengeance and it felt like I was back to square one. But little by little and day by day, I got better. Even still, there are moments of inexplicable anxiety that I have to deal with. But I’m learning to lean into God like never before when these moments occur.
I’m no medical expert. However, the one thing I’ve found most helpful during this season has been perhaps the most underrated miracle cure in the world….R E S T. During those times of anxiety, I’ve learned to create time to rest – even moving my diary around so it can happen. It’s only when I’m well rested that I can manage the tension of worry and find perspective. I would go as far as to say that rest is a spiritual thing. Jesus himself invited us to rest when he said ‘Come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you REST’ (Matthew 11:28).
Rest is an act of faith. It is not complacent – but is a statement of trust in God’s grace. Ultimately, this is the resting place of those who follow Christ.
If you find yourself struggling with worry, I want you to know that you’re not alone. Anxiety is no respecter of persons. No-matter how ‘strong’ you think you are, no-body is THAT strong. It’s in those times of struggle that we need to learn to lean in and make our resting place in God. He is our shelter. He is our fortress. His name is our strong tower. The Bible tells us that ‘The righteous run into it and they are safe’ (Prov 18:10). This has certainly been my experience. May it be yours too.
Ever picked up weird vibes from being around somebody? I guess we’ve all encountered them at times. When I experience them, I always try to give the other person the benefit of the doubt. The first thing I tend to do is try to check my own heart to see if I’m the one who has caused the sense of weirdness. For example, have I said something inappropriate? Is my demeanour awkward? Is my body language defensive? Have I hit a raw nerve in something I’ve asked about? Is it the way I’m looking, sounding, smiling? Maybe the the other person is going through something in their life which I have no idea about? The questions could go on and on. BUT the danger of this kind of internal questioning is that it can quickly change from healthy self-awareness to unhealthy paranoia. Sure, no doubt there are times when I can be the cause of weird vibes – but not always.
One of the weirdest vibes you’ll ever encounter is when you’re talking to someone who is beside you – but they’re not really ‘present’ with you. In other words, they are distracted as they constantly glance around to see who else might pass by. They’re poised to make a quick exit in order to take advantage of a better opportunity. That’s just how some people live their lives. But for me, this is weird. As soon as I pick up on this kind of vibe, I tend to disengage from the ‘conversation’ because I’m not willing to be treated as second class. I try to give anyone I talk to my full attention no-matter who they are – and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect anything less in return.
Anyway, there’s not much you can do about other people. But you can do something about YOU. Here are eight ways you can try to protect yourself from giving off weird vibes:
1) BE FRIENDLY – It’s not rocket science. Just be friendly and approachable. This really helps.
2) SPEAK POSITIVELY – Set the tone. If you’re ‘weird’ for not gossiping and backbiting, that’s not such a bad thing. Just keep it all positive.
3) AVOID INTENSITY – The shallow end of the conversation pool is underrated. It’s always better to make your way to the deep end from there. Do shallow really well. This is about connecting on the same level. Take your time before making ‘best friends’. Far better that way.
4) BE SELF AWARE – Make sure you’re not the cause of weird vibes. See the questions I asked myself above.
5) RESPECT BOUNDARIES – Learn to read people quickly. Overstepping their personal boundaries of space and tactilty is the surest way to provoke antagonism. So be sure to read and respect this.
6) ASK QUESTIONS – You can tell far more about someone by the questions they ask than the statements they make. So ask great questions.
7) LISTEN WELL – After you ask a question, LISTEN to the answer!!!! It might not be the answer you want. But that’s not the point. It’s all about listening well to others. The lack of this is a definite cause of weird vibes!
8) TAKE INTEREST – Remembering details that people mention to you is HOW you build real and genuine connection into their hearts. This means taking genuine interest in those you do life with.
